Day 10: Symbol

I was trying to think of a symbol for my baby, something that is symbolic to me. I've thought for days. 

Lots of things remind me of Landon...

Whenever I see a butterfly, I imagine that somehow, Landon is floating near me. I think of the poem about butterflies coming near us and how for just that moment, their beauty belongs to us, but then the butterfly flies away again and even though we are sad to see it go, we feel lucky to have seen it... my time with Landon was short, quick like the butterfly. Butterflies are beautiful and when I see butterflies, I think of Landon.

Every summer there are a few dragonflies flying around. I've never associated them with Landon, but when I saw this one particular red colored dragonfly, I immediately thought of Landon. Dragonflies are beautiful and when I see them, I think of Landon.

I've lived in Michigan for most of my life. There are 4 very distinct seasons here. Fall is full of color but I've never noticed that. The past 2 years I've been mesmerized by the colors of fall. Brilliant reds, oranges, browns, yellows, they're just so so beautiful. I can't believe I've missed years of beautiful fall colors, my baby will never see one and I've taken them for granted. The beauty in the fall colors is magnificent and when I see fall colors, I think of Landon.

Sunrise, sunset. I've never cared about the sunrise. I've always been sleeping. Since my son died I take more time. I take time to look at things, things for which I had never had time. One of those things I notice is the beauty in the sunrise and the beauty in the sunset. Pre-loss I simply didn't care. Post-loss I can't get enough. The colors amaze me more every single day. In my job, I am privileged to be able to see the sun rise over the Bay 5 days a week. The beauty amazes me and when I see the sunrise, I think of Landon.

I've never been big on flowers, I like them but they don't really do anything for me. Since Landon passed away, I'm consistently amazed at the beauty in flowers. Each flower is beautiful. I love the colors, I love the smells, and although I never did in the past, I always stop to smell them. Flowers are beautiful and when I see them, I think of Landon

Day 10 is supposed to be a symbol for your baby. Since Landon died, I have started taking time to see the beauty in things. Beauty, somehow, makes me feel hopeful. For me, beauty and hope symbolize my baby. I chose a picture of some flowers and a garden plaque that were given to me by a group of women I met online. We were all pregnant at the same time and due in April 2010. Some of these women have experienced loss, some have not, but they have been great to me during my loss. These flowers and garden stone were given to me from the April 2010 Dew Drops for Landon's first birthday. The stone says it all...